There is no fairy godmother in the time-honored tale of Cinderella as captured by the Brothers Grimm. There is a terribly abused girl who stays true to her values, chooses wisely, and then makes the very best of what she has in order to defeat her oppressors and restore her dignity. The premise is not quite as glamorous as the Disney version with its sparkly otherworldly being who waves a magic wand and changes a poor girl's fate, but it is far more empowering.
When Cinderella's father goes to the fair and offers to bring back presents, his new stepdaughters ask for beautiful dresses, pearls, and jewels. Then he turns to Cinderella, asking what she would have, and she tells him to break off for her the first branch that knocks against his hat on the way home. A curious request in light of her pitiable circumstances, but it is the first step in this tale of how Cinderella got her power back.
As it so happens, a hazel twig brushes against her father's hat, and he breaks off the branch for her. While her wicked stepsisters delight in their new finery, Cinderella plants the hazel branch on her mother's grave and waters it with her tears. Soon it grows into a handsome tree, and Cinderella weeps and prays beneath it three times a day. A little white bird always comes to the tree when she is there, and when Cinderella expresses a wish, it throws down what she asks for. There are various theories on what the white bird symbolizes: the spirit of Cinderella's deceased mother, innocence, peace, love, truth, and the connection to nature have all been postulated. In later versions, of course, the white dove becomes the fairy godmother.
Unlike her materially obsessed stepsisters, Cinderella knows the value of the natural world. She is connected to magic that is primordial and chthonic. When she plants the hazel branch on her mother's grave, she taps into her ancestral roots, her mother line, and the power of Mother Earth herself. It is no accident that the branch her father brought her was from a hazel, a tree of knowledge, wisdom, and inspiration. Cinderella grew exactly what she needed to regain her sovereignty.
When her stepmother gives her the impossible task of picking a full dish of lentils out of the ashes before she can be allowed to attend the ball at the King's palace that night, Cinderella calls for all the birds beneath the sky to come and help her. She has gained strength and resources now that her family knows nothing about. She has grown wiser and more sure of herself from her days spent under the hazel.
The birds pick the lentils out easily, but then her stepmother points out that Cinderella has nothing nice to wear. Everyone leaves for the palace without her, but she visits her mother's grave again beneath the hazel and asks for appropriate attire. The white bird throws down a dress of gold and silver with shoes of embroidered silk, and Cinderella makes her way to the ball. She captivates the prince so utterly that he refuses to dance with anyone else. Her stepmother and stepsisters do not recognize her, believing that she is a foreign princess. One of the hard truths in this story is that Cinderella is never truly seen by her own family. It takes someone far more noble and genuine to appreciate her inherent beauty. (How many of us can relate?)
I think it's important to point out here, too, that the prince sees his equal in Cinderella. He is not her rescuer; he is more like her animus, the unconscious masculine part of herself that she must reclaim in order to be whole again. It's clear by this point in the story that Cinderella is rescuing herself by her own magical abilities and connection to natural forces. Her stepsisters only view the prince as a ticket to fortune and status. They cannot envision a life without dependency on a man and his riches. But Cinderella has her own kind of wealth—an unlimited Universal power to which she is perfectly aligned—something that draws the prince and her destiny to her.
Determined to know her identity, the prince smears a staircase with pitch on the third night of the ball, which traps one of Cinderella's shoes as she runs away. The following morning, he brings the shoe to her father, saying that "none shall be my wife but she whose foot the golden slipper fits." Of course the first stepsister is delighted until she realizes that she can't squeeze her foot into the shoe. Urged by her mother, she cuts off her toe to make the shoe fit, but soon blood is seeping through and the ruse is apparent. The shoe doesn't fit the other stepsister, either, who shaves off part of her own heel. Once again, the prince sees blood seeping through the sock and knows he is being deceived. At last, Cinderella is brought forth, the shoe fits, and the prince recognizes his true bride.
There are several lessons in this scene to unpack. I can understand why Disney didn't have the stepsisters hacking off a toe and a heel, but it's important to the story because it shows their desperation to be chosen and to please their misguided mother. I am haunted by this patriarchal image of a mother insisting that her own daughters maim themselves in order to secure marriage, but so many mothers have sent their daughters straight into marital hells to secure wealth, unite kingdoms, and maintain societal expectations. The pain of that lingers and continues to this day. How many times have we all diminished ourselves in some way to fit a mold that was never meant for us?
In the end, the stepsisters stand on either side of Cinderella at the wedding, still hoping to garner her favor even after all the ways they tortured her, and the doves peck out their eyes. Blindness seems a just punishment (at least in fairy tales) for those who cannot see and honor the true beauty of heart and soul.
Cinderella begins to reclaim her identity the instant that she takes the opportunity to ask for what her heart needs, which was a way to grieve and to honor her deep loss. With the hazel branch, she creates her own way to commune with nature, cultivate her ancestral magic, and receive guidance from her higher self, all of which bring about her full transformation from a girl forced to sleep in the ashes to a noble princess. She teaches us that the power lies within us to change our world and that the divine essence of who we are is never truly lost.
Some questions for meditation and journaling:
What strengths and gifts from your mother line are helping you now?
What helps you reconnect with the loving generosity of Mother Earth? If it's hard for you to ask for what you need, what holds you back?
In times when you've felt persecuted or abused by others, what was your own personal hazel branch? How did you use something that others would deem humble or insignificant to change your fate?
Would Cinderella have discovered her own power and magic if not for her tormentors? Can you think of a hardship in your own life that ultimately helped you find your authentic self?
What parts of your true self have you cut away or hidden in order to fit into a mold made by family, society, or culture? How did you break away from the mold and reclaim those hidden or discarded parts?
When has someone mirrored your own divine light back to you? When have you done that for others?
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